is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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