He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
