half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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