I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
