Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
