Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Randomize
