I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
