I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
