It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
