the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
