Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Randomize
