Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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