You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Randomize