My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize