Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
