It's Friday. Sex?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
