Midget sex pt 2 tonight
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
