if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize