Are we in a gay sports bar?
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
