We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
