bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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