i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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