I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
