Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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