I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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