I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
