There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Also, beer. Big fan.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize