Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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