The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
