so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
