how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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