You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
