It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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