So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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