didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
