i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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