We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize
