well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
