She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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