How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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