bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize