Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
