So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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