Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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