"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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