i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
