in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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