what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize
