If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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