i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
